Life with Sherlock
by Night Rider 95
Summary: A few short stories, from Johns point of view, about living with the great Sherlock Holmes. Please leave comments tell if you like it or not thanks : Oh btw no slash
1. Bathtime

**Ok hi :) this is my first Sherlock story so be kind. I love the show, I even think it's better then Dr Who which is saying something. I love Sherlock and John the are the weirdest friends which is what made me start writing this, so I hope you enjoy.**

**I don't own Sherlock, I'm just a fan of the show.**

"Jesus!" I stared down into the bath and cringed.

"Sherlock!" I bellowed from the bathroom. All I wanted was a nice relaxing bath. I mean it is Saturday and we didn't have a case but no, the Worlds only Consulting Detective still manages to ruin my morning.

"Sherlock Holmes!" I yell, still no answer. Sighing I grab my towel rap it round my waist and make my way downstairs. I walk into the living room to find Sherlock with his legs over one arm of his armchair and his head resting on the other arm, eyes closed.

"Sherlock?"

"Mmm What?" He mumbled with a slightly irritated tone. "Can't you see I'm thinking?"

"Sherlock why is there a body in the bath tub?" I ask trying to keep my voice calm and even.

"Experiment." Was all he said.

Anger bubbled up. _No John, stay calm it's only because he has no case and he's bored._

"Right. Well could you move it please. I want a bath." I managed to say without yelling.

He opened his eyes and looked at me.

"Why would I do that? It would ruin the experiment."

"Move it"

"No"

"Sherlock. I'm going to count to three if it isn't moved by then I with throw your skull away."

"I'm not a child John." He said then "You wouldn't actually throw my skull away would you?" He asked worriedly.

"Sherlock move the flipping body right now or I swear to god I will take your skull and throw it out the window!" My voice level climbed with every word until I was yelling at him. _So much for staying calm,_ I thought.

"Your angry." He stated.

"Oh well done Mr. Holmes. You picked up on that did you?" I told him sarcasticly.

"Fine I'll move the body." He jumped up.

10 minutes later I sunk into a steaming hot bath and sighed. He's not too bad, Sherlock I mean, he's a good mate. He did move the body for me after all and I can't say I don't have enough excitment in my life.

After a bit I hopped out and made my way to my room. _I wonder where he put the body?_ I walked through my door.

"JESUS SHERLOCK!" I yelled. I could hear him come running up the stairs.

"What?" He asked putting his head round the door. I pointed to my bed and glared at him.

"Well **you** told me to move him!" He said staring at me innocently with a slight pout on his face.

"Yeah but not into my bed you arse!"


	2. Apple Juice

**Ok hi :) Please review if you read. I really would like to know what you guys think.**

**I don't own Sherlock, I'm just a fan of the show.**

I woke up to hear Sherlock banging around downstairs. I roll over and look at the clock, 5am. Groaning I get up and walk down the stairs to find Sherlock rushing around the living room mumbling to himself.

"Do you know what time it is?" I ask him sleepily, rubbing my eyes.

"Mmm... Oh yes, I think it's 5 in the morning isn't it?" He replied distractedly. I shake my head.

"New case then?" I ask him.

"Yes." He said shortly. I watch him rush around for a bit then ask him what he's doing.

"Trying to find something." Was all he said so I walk into the kitchen to get a drink. I open the fridge and look in, there isn't much in there. _Note to self: Buy milk... and food. _The only thing in the fridge is a bottle of apple juice. I take it out and pour myself a glass, wondering when we brought apple juice. Then walk back into the living room to watch Sherlock rush around. I take a sip and ask him what he's looking for.

"My coa- What are you drinking?" He asked suddenly and stared intently at my glass of apple juice.

"Apple juice. Why? You want some?"

Mixed emotions show on his face as if hes not sure wether to laugh or not.

"What?" I ask, suddenly suspicious.

"I wouldn't drink that if I were you." He said. My jaw dropped.

"Why? Is it poison? What is it?" I was panicking big time.

"Oh it's only dog urine." He smiled as if it's one big joke. I gag, suddenly feeling quite sick.

"Why is there dog urine in the fridge? Why didn't you label it?" I yell, this wasn't funny.

"Experiment." He laughed I felt like punching him.

"Why didn't you label it?"

"I did, look." He flounced into the kitchen and flung open the fridge the paused.

"Oh wait did you drink from this one?" He asks pulling out the apple juice bottle.

"Yes"

"Oh..." He frowned.

"What?"

"Oh well thats not dog urine." He said and put the bottle back and grabbed his coat and made for the door.

"Oh that's good so it's just apple juice then." I smile with relief and take a gulp from my glass.

"Well no its my urine." He said over his shoulder as he ran for it. I spit it out and gag.

"SHERLOCK!" I scream after him but he is already gone. Anger boils up inside me.

"That bastard! That idiot!" I fume and then feel my phone buzz. I pull it out and read the message:

**Sorry. Really I am.**

**SH**

I sigh. Ah well, what did I expect? I live with a nutter. I text back:

**Wait until you get home. Im going to kill you**

**JW**

I send the message and smile, that's what I get for living with a weirdo.


End file.
